Sunday, April 10, 2011

A mother's love along with a wife's love

Today as I watched my husband play and interact with our children I begin to think about the day when they are all five foot something and have their own kids to play with. Someone reminded me that the day that happens will be amazingly beautiful. But until then I think about something near and dear to my heart. What is the difference from a mother's love of her son and a wife's love of her husband who just happens to be the same man.

I think about my husbands love for his mother and her love for him and I shed tears. My mother in law is a true blessing. She loves her son. She loves her grand babies. She loves me. She is an amazing part of who he is today. I owe her a lifetime of thanks for raising a man that is my everything. She is so kind and loving. A mother's love is endless and a wife must be sure to understand this extreme love. The mother gave birth to this man. A mother raised this man. She will be connected to him for life. She was his first love.

A wife is bonded to her husband through marriage. She promises to love him. She promises to take care of him. She bears and raises his children. She is connected to her husband. But she must remember that a mother must not and can not be replaced. A wife and a mother should be on the same level. The man would not be here without the mother and the mother grateful that the wife cares and loves her son.

This relationship is not an easy road to traverse. A mother may not think the best things of the future daughter. She may have concerns. She may worry if he is picking the right girl. She may think he is making a huge mistake. She may fear for his heart. She may not agree at all. But she has but one choice, to continuing loving her son and make room for his wife. She is HIS MOTHER for a lifetime and even when she passes. He will always love, cherish and put his mother on a pedestal. But that pedestal just grew by two feet because he added his wife to it. Mom must be happy to make room as wife should smile that she has gained a new position.

A wife will struggle to share her husbands love with another woman but she must always remember that neither woman will replace the other. They both are important with separate yet equal roles in the man's life. Both women must work to make the relationship work for the man in their lives.

Arguing is unacceptable.
Giving him an ultimatum is a death sentence.
Bashing the other is shameful.
Refusing to get along only causes stress.
Agree to love.
Agree to share.
Agree that he is God's son.

I am most grateful that my husbands mother has chosen love. She accepted me. She made room on the pedestal for me. She intrusted me with her precious blood. Today my mother in law has become my second mother. I love her, I trust her, I can talk to her, I can lean on her and she doesn't judge me. She gives good advice that I don't always follow. She supports our decisions however bad they are. She loves my children no matter how many I create. She loves her son more than anything. She supports her son in everything. And she hangs our family picture on her wall for all to admire.

Today, I hope that you wives and you mothers will search your hearts to make your husbands and sons lives complete by loving and accepting each other and understanding that you will not replace the other but both of you are just as important as the other and neither is any better for him than the other. Agree to love equally and agree to understand that you are both in love with a man who is the same person.

Once you are the mother of a son you will soon understand the role you will take and you will hope your future daughter will accept you.

Blessings on a loving life as a mother and a wife.

Thank you L, I appreciate your acceptance and love of me as a new part of your family when Zeus chose me. I accept you and gladly and proudly share this pedestal with you as we love a very special Man.

Happy Haskins House


Charisse said...

Your words always move me so deeply. I am so sorry I haven't been by in SOME time - but I am here now. And WOW!!!!