Did I tell you guys that I am a little excited. Not too much, only a little.
Zeus comes home tomorrow afternoon and will be home for at least 6 months. Can you believe it? No, neither can I. It has been a very long time since normal has happened at our house. I am just a little thrilled to see it coming our way. There are some really good days in life and today is and has been a great day.
Kids have cooperated perfectly today. What a blessing from Heaven that was. I was stressing last night that today was gonna be rough. See what Prayer does, it makes a difference.
So If you do not hear too much from me for a few days you will understand we will be trying to reintegrate our family again after a long absence of normalcy.
Thursday, April 29, 2010
Did I tell you guys that I am a little excited. Not too much, only a little.
Sweet writings of HaskinsHouse at 4:52 PM
Saturday, April 24, 2010
Today I sit here thinking how terribly frustrated I am with my little world or company.
I think about some recent and not so recent decisions I made. Then I think "did I make the right choice? Is this REALLY what I signed up for? WOW, if it is I must be dumb, stupid or maybe just a little possessed"
I try my best to make sure everything I THINK I am in control of is spinning in just the right direction at just the right speed. But days like today and yesterday question my abilities to make it spin anyway at all.
Being a wife is definitely a tough task. Especially being a part time/ long distance wife. I do not get the physical moments most live-in wives get. I do not get a daily hug. I do not get the sweet touches or kisses that rejuvenate the soul. Those times where words are not needed just simple cuddling. PURE AFFECTION. You know that thing that makes you feel and think, OH I CAN do this. That feeling of relief and comfort. Yeah, not so much. This has proven a more challenging test then what I imagined.
Now throw in the MOM factor. Not to bad. But now multiply that times 4. Just got significantly harder. I know my job to teach, mold, shape and grow 4 little beings into what I believe is a productive, effective, and positive member of society sounds easy. Its not. And trying to do it alone is far exceeding my limits.
Now add a little Stay at Home action to that. Meaning my JOB is to run this place we all call a home. Only one problem, not one of the 5 other members likes or listens to how I plan or try to manage this place. NOPE, they each want to do it ALL there own way. Could you imagine a company running that way? Every employee trying to tell the CEO how to do this and what to do with that. Are you kidding me? You would be fired just like that. Seems I do not have the ability to fire any of the 5 employees that are under me. Like Mister Trump says, If I can not control my employees or motivate them I must be a lousy leader.I am definitely second guessing my desire to continue on this journey of being a CEO of so many. Why not fire myself and make my own company where I am the only employee.Sounds good huh?
This rings harsh to my psyche. I want to through my hands up and let the Assistant CEO take over. But the issue is that I would still be doing most of the CEO job just getting paid a mail room clerks salary and not receiving any of the credit I would be due. That asst. would take credit for it all and expect me to make it all go smoothly.
This is not how I pictured running my company/ life. I am not sure how to change it.
My asst. CEO is only a part time employee and does not see how I do things on an everyday basis. The asst. doesn't care of the current business plan. The asst. just comes in and takes over throwing all my ideas out the window, doing it their way. WHAT? A company will never survive this way. The employees will get confused on what rules and laws to follow. The method of packaging is completely different. The method of cleaning and scheduling is far worse. These little employees try their best to follow all the methods set in front of them but they are seriously contemplating going on strike. They want the asst. fired from their duties. The CEO is who they want to take charge. The CEO is who they support. The CEO is who they want to work for, not the asst.
How do you tell the asst. that his methods are about to bring the whole thing crashing down on him and the CEO. How do you take control out of the asst.'s hands and return it where it rightfully belongs, in the CEO's?
I have tried polling other CEO's on how they run their own similar yet different company. The answer they all have is disheartening to me. They say you hired the wrong asst. or you need to train them or send them to training. WHAT? I just shake my head. Where is this training? How in the world do you train a know-it-all assistant and make a difference?
How do you avoid a complete uprising from the employees? How do you manage to keep peaceful control? What do you do when one of the employees thinks they can do a better job than the asst and want to be promoted?
This is what my life has become. As hard as I try to do the dishes, laundry, disciplining, mothering, fathering and every other duty that has been placed in my lap. I have fallen short. I have faltered in my communication. I have created chaos and almost full blown rioting. I pray. Lord help me please. I obviously can not do this alone and by the looks of it my way is not working.
My managing is at risk of complete failure with the asst. setting up a covert coup. How do I avoid the unstoppable?
Are you a CEO? If so how do you motivate your assistant to only do certain tasks and without disrupting the other plan you have already implemented? I am looking deep for healthy, supportive yet problem solving answers and suggestions. Go ahead, SHOOT, because my gun is jammed!!!
Thursday, April 15, 2010
We reached another great milestone this week.
I know, these milestones are all happening way to fast. Before I know it I will have 3 daughters in law and a son in law. HOLY COW!!!
No really. Having moved to a new base, we are in for a few changes from our old base. IMAGINE THAT.
The kids love to play organized sports. They are very competitive as are Zeus and I . We encourage the kids to try everything a couple times and make friends through team sports.
Last time we coached was fall soccer in D.C. Zeus coached Zero and Omega and I coached Zulu. Ziggy had to sit on the sidelines and watch. After that season I realized Zulu needed a non-parent coach in the future. We just butted heads WAY. TO. MUCH. To the point of embarrassment. Anyways that was that.
So once we got here and checked the sport schedule much to our surprise the south has spring soccer. Yippee! This is my favorite sport to watch with youth . It is just too precious and quite funny, but we won't tell my babies that.
Anyways we signed the 3 big kids up and proceeded to eval day. Much to my surprise 3 and 4 yr olds could play at this base. WOW, that is super cool. So we watched as the big kids took there evaluation. The following day the phone rang. Zeus answered and was told Zulu is very advanced for his age, would we be ok with him moving up. First off, we knew the child has natural abilities. So yes absolutely especially if it benefits him. Once Zeus told me I was thrilled but freaking scared. WHY?
Because Zeus and I had committed to coaching Zero and Omega's team. Now Zulu would join the bunch. UH OH, were my first thoughts. I needed to talk to Zulu quickly and ask what he thought about being back on Mom and Dad's team. He was not to thrilled about the coachs but tuned that out as he realized he was only 6 and going to be playing with 9-12 yr olds. He did the boogy dance. Just a little on the happy side. Lets just hope the coaching issue is a minor set back.
But the best part of all of this is that fact that the littlest member of our Haskins House is going to play soccer. YEP, you heard it hear first. Ziggy is now officially a soccer star. Thrilling.Exciting.
OH Geez, what have I gotten myself into. All 4 are playing organized sports. YIKES. This is definitely going to be interesting. Thankfully Zeus will only miss the first 2 weeks. Then at least I will have a back up.
Wish me luck! I am definitely going to need it. Let the wheels turn on my soccer mobile cause this Soccer Mom is on the run.
I will leave you with a few shots of Ziggy's first practice.
Come back soon to watch and see more from the Haskins House Live in Mississippi
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
This past week was a huge milestone not only to me but to my family as well. As a mother, not all, but most look forward to the day that their little birdie grows wings and learns to fly. I have always looked forward to this day. But I think it came more quickly than I imagined. Don't get me wrong here, OK. Here me out. I love all these beauties God loaned me. They are precious and I would not give them away for any amount of money.
I think as they get older and start to flourish it makes us thrilled and excited to see them learn more and do more. Kinda like the day when they crawl. walk. talk. You see its so thrilling. So as the day quickly approached, and I do mean quickly I begin to get excited.
Not for all the reasons many of you think. My little man is extremely intelligent and has been showing us signs for a LONG time. I have worked with him as have his older siblings. And because of this he is far ahead of where he should be, and that's great. But I had reached the point where I could not give him all the education needs in which he desired. So the time came to send him off to school. I was thrilled that he could make friends. I was ready for him to learn better writing skills. I was ready for him to be with others his own age. He was ready to go into a group setting. I was slightly looking forward to some time to myself. This was not my motivating factor at all. It truly was to get my baby the education he needs.
That day came on Tuesday when he attended his very first day of school. That was one of the first days he was not up and at em when the alarm went off. He really did not want to get out of bed at all. I was sad because I had to wake him. I was excited to see his face when he walked into that room with those other children. Once he was up he was GUNG HO for school.
He ate breakfast while explaining to me and the big kids what he was going to do that day at school. It was precious. He already had it planned out in his little mind. He got dressed all on his own, to my disappointment. I really did want to help him, my baby. Nope, He told me he did not need my help. OUCH!!! Then he promptly gathered his backpack and things and proceeded out the front door. One problem, we did not have to leave for 20 minutes. Yea, he was slightly excited. It was adorable. The best part of the morning was watching and listening to the big kids cheer him on and give him advice and ask him things. AWESOME. I was proud of the big kids for being so supportive and helpful. I was sad to. Because I knew this was it. No more baby. No more morning snuggles. No more hanging in our jammie's. No more excuses. All my babies have earned their wings. I was a little sad driving there. I was sure not to let him see it. I talked excitedly about what he would do. Then I walked him in and signed him in. Gave him a GIANT HUG AND KISS and away he went.
What a great day for him and super sad day for me.
Blessings to all of you! come back soon